Thursday Stuff We Get From Shakespeare Open Comments

I didn’t realize there were so many colloquialisms that sprang forth from the quill of Shakespeare.



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86 thoughts on “Thursday Stuff We Get From Shakespeare Open Comments

  1. Unexpectedly,…
    WASHINGTON (AP) — Call it the recession’s lost generation.

    In record-setting numbers, young adults struggling to find work are shunning long-distance moves to live with Mom and Dad, delaying marriage and buying fewer homes, often raising kids out of wedlock. They suffer from the highest unemployment since World War II and risk living in poverty more than others – nearly 1 in 5.

    Mornin’ Gang

  2. It’s a plan working out perfectly, the yutes are learning how much they need gubment and who stands in the way of the assistance.

  3. The difference between Texas volunteers and DC “experts” straight from my inbox.

    And we all need to remember FEMA …..
    There must be a place for them but it isn’t, it seems, to provide support or provision. Read on….


    When government gets out of the way
    Amazing! Everyone needs to read this.

    Here’s some stories you won’t hear about the Tricounty fire in Montgomery, Grimes, and Waller County early in September 2011.

    My neighbor across the road has a sister named Kenna. Labor Day, when she saw the huge column of smoke over our homes, she left a birthday party at my neighbor’s house to meet with her friend Tara at the baseball complex in Magnolia. She called the owner of the complex and got permission to use the warehouse there as a staging area for donations for the fire fighting effort.

    They put a notice out on facebook that they were going to be taking donations on their facebook pages. That night as they were setting up tables and organizing, News 2 Houston came by and saw the activity, investigated and left with the phone numbers and a list of suggested donations.

    The facebook notice propagated faster than the fire. By dawn they had 20 volunteers, bins, forklifts, and donations were pouring in. I stopped by with my pitiful little bags of nasal wash and eye wash, and was amazed. There must have been 20 trucks in the lot, offloading cases of water, pallets of Gatorade , and people lined up out the door with sacks of beef jerky, baby wipes, underwear, socks, and you name it. School buses and trailers from many counties around were there offloading supplies, students froming living chains to pass stuff into the bins for transport to the command center and staging areas. If the firefighters had requested it, it was there. What do you give the guy out there fighting the fire that might engulf your home? Anything he or she wants. Including chewing tobacco and cigarettes.

    Kenna moved on to the Unified Command Post at Magnolia West High school. She looked at what the fire fighters needed, and she made calls and set it up.
    Mattress Mac donated 150 beds. Two class rooms turned into barracks kept quiet and dark for rest. The CEO of HEB donated 2 semi trailers full of supplies, and sent a mobile commercial kitchen at no charge to feed all the workers, but especially our firefighters, 3 hot meals a day. An impromptu commissary was set up, anything the firefighters had requested available at no charge.

    As exhausted firefighters (most of them from local VFDs with no training or experience battling wildfires) and workers came into the school after long hours of hard labor, dehydrated, hungry, covered with soot and ash, they got what they needed. They were directed through the commissary, where they got soap, eye wash and nasal spray, candy, clean socks and underwear, and then were sent off to the school locker rooms for a shower. HEB then fed them a hot meal and they got 8 hours sleep in a barracks, then another hot meal, another pass through the commissary for supplies to carry with them out to lines, including gloves, safety glasses, dust masks and snacks, and back they went.

    One of the imported crew from California came into Unified Command and asked where the FEMA Powerbars and water were. He was escorted to the commissary and started through the system. He was flabbergasted. He said FEMA never did it like this. Kenna replied, ”Well, this is the way we do it in Texas.”

    Fire fighting equipment needed repair? The auto shop at the High School ran 24/7 with local mechanics volunteering, students, and the firefighters fixing the equipment. Down one side of the school, the water tankers lined up at the fire hydrants and filled with water. Down the other side there was a steady parade of gasoline tankers filling trucks, dozers, tankers, cans, chain saws, and vehicles.

    Mind you, all of this was set up by 2 Moms, Kenna and Tara, with a staff of 20 simple volunteers, most of them women who had sons, daughters, husbands, and friends on the fire lines. Someone always knew someone who could get what they needed- beds, mechanics, food, space. Local people using local connections to mobilize local resources made this happen. No government aid. No Trained Expert. At one point the fire was less than a mile from the school, and everyone but hose volunteers were evacuated. The fire was turned.

    The Red Cross came in, looked at what they were doing, and quietly went away to set up a fire victim relief center nearby. They said they couldn’t do it any better.

    FEMA came in and told those volunteers and Kenna that they had to leave, FEMA was here now. Kenna told them she worked for the firefighters, not them. They were obnoxious, bossy, got in the way, and criticized everything. The volunteers refused to back down and kept doing their job, and doing it well. Next FEMA said the HEB supplies and kitchen had to go, that was blatant commercialism. Kenna said they stayed. They stayed. FEMA threw a wall-eyed fit about chewing tobacco and cigarettes being available in the commissary area. Kenna told them the firefighters had requested it, and it was staying. It stayed. FEMA got very nasty and kept asking what organization these volunteers belonged to and all the volunteers told them “Our community”. FEMA didn’t like that and demanded they make up a name for themselves. One mother remarked “They got me at my boiling point!” and suddenly the group was “212 Degrees”.

    FEMA’s contribution? They came in the next day with red shirts embroidered with “212 Degrees”, insisting the volunteers had to be identified, never realizing it was a slap in their face. Your tax dollars at work- labeling volunteers with useless shirts and getting in the way.

    The upshot? A fire that the experts from California (for whom we are so grateful there are no words) said would take 2-3 weeks to get under control was 100% contained in 8 days. There was so much equipment and supplies donated, 3 container trucks are loaded with the excess to go and set up a similar relief center for the fire fighters in Bastrop.

    The local relief agencies have asked people to stop bringing in donations of clothing, food, household items, and pretty much everything else because they only have 60 displaced households to care for, and there is enough to supply hundreds. Again, excess is going to be shipped to Bastrop, where there are 1500 displaced households. Wish we could send Kenna, too, but she has to go back to her regular job.

    These are a few stories my neighbor shared poolside with me tonight, Tues Sept 13, 2011.

  4. Not one but two oxygen thieves were “rehabilitated” last night. One, which was mentioned in last nights thread (Hammy #75), the racist slime ball who killed James Byrd, was Lawrence Russel Brewer; a white guy. The other was written about by Ann Coulter and linkied by me yesterday (#64), his name was Troy Davis; a black guy. Is the death penalty racist or is it just punishment for heinous crime? Is the fact that more blacks are sentenced to death evidence of racism or evidence that blacks commit more heinous crimes?
    Brewer, was unrepentant up to the point which he died and was no longer capable of repentance; Davis never took ownership/responsibility for his crime yet apologized for the pain the family experienced. I think both are experiencing extreme discomfort now. I do not wish to join them – either in their behavior in life or in death where they are getting true justice.

  5. #12 TT:

    I’m really glad Gore didn’t become president. He obviously sucks at math.

    Not necessary to use the extra words.

  6. #10, I wondered how that turned out. FEMA had announced they were taking over, but had not tried to do so while I was there. They were not very thrilled about it. Those HEB trailers were 40′ refrigerated ones. There was also smaller trailer kept stocked with ice. BTW, thanks to Oltimer for posting the volunteer information.

  7. Why do we even consider putting any pressure on Israel to make peace with the palestenians when the palestenians continue to do things like this? The liberal mantra is that the palestenians want to live side by side in peace with the Israelis, clearly that is a blatant falsehood as the logo in the linkie above demonstrates. The palestenians represent a clear and present existential danger to Israel as do Syria, Iran and now Lebanon. The other nations in the region are not as white-hot acute as these 3 but are by no means to be considered as friendly.

  8. **MORE kneemail requested**

    As if going through CHEMO and battling cancer wasn’t enough………….our BACA Sister Shooter-Gal’s Mom passed away yesterday

    THANKS in advance!

  9. #10 Bones
    Yay, Kenna and Tara. That is what I love about Texas. Takin’ care of bidness. They didn’t back down, step aside, or kowtow to those gubmint twits.

  10. I want to say how much I am enjoying Wagonburner’s OC threads this week! On Monday we talked like pirates, on Tuesday we did heavy-duty politics on Obammy’s jobs bill, Wednesday caption contest, Shakespeare today. Ok Pyro, what will you have for us tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow… ?

  11. THE SILVER SCREW………..a classic fairy tale.

    Once upon a time, a young lad was born without a bellybutton. In its place was a silver screw. All the doctors told his mother there was nothing they could do. Like it or not, he was stuck with it. He was screwed. All the years of growing up were real tough on him, as all who saw the screw made fun of him. He avoided leaving his house. . .thus, never made any friends. One day, a mysterious stranger saw his belly and told him of a monk in Tibet who could get rid of the screw for him. He was thrilled. The next day, he took all of his life’s savings and bought a ticket to Nepal . After several days of climbing up steep cliffs, he came upon a giant monastery. The monk knew exactly why he had come. The screwy guy was told to sleep in the highest tower of the monastery and the following day when he woke, the screw would have been removed. The man immediately went to the room and fell asleep. During the night while he slept, a purple fog floated in an open window. In the mist floated a solid silver screwdriver. In just moments, the screwdriver removed the screw and disappeared out the window. The next morning when the man awoke, he saw the silver screw lying on the pillow next to him. Reaching down, he felt his navel, and there was no screw there! Jubilant, he leaped out of bed…and his butt fell off!

    The moral to this is:

    ‘Don’t screw around with things you don’t understand — You could lose your a$$.’

    President Obozo is noted for screwing around with things he doesn’t understand – like the economy. That’s why we are all losing our a$$es!

    (Check your navel)

  12. Volunteer fire departments could raise a ton of money by publicizing that story and selling “212 Degrees” t-shirts.

  13. #21 Katfish

    This is similar to an Aggie joke:

    An Aggie goes to school, and his friends ask him why he has a screw in his navel. “My mom just told me to never take it out,” he said. They egged him on, until one day he grabbed a screwdriver and went to work. As he removed the screw – his butt fell off!

    This was the inspiration for my caption on TBO yesterday. He has to keep tightening the screws or he loses his butt.

  14. #28 RM
    Looks like the popular favorite was Tedtam’s:

    “Just tightening the screw that keeps my butt from falling off.”

    But there were lots of good ones. Yours that I liked best was:

    34) “What do you mean ABO is ahead of me in the polls?”

  15. #30 TT: What a jerk-weasel! I just love the stoooooooooooooooooopid “awareness” ribbons. Those particular SWAT dudes are just rectums in uniform.

  16. Wow. My reaction wasn’t that strong. I just though it was amusing, since I’ve been know to “push” a door instead of “pull,” even when the sign is inches from my face.

  17. #34 TT: The issue is that particular SWAT-VSR was desperately trying to be a bad-azz by kicking the door open instead of simply opening it with his hand like a civilized human being. There was obviously no emergency or need of surprise entrance as there were SWAT officers all over the place in front of a glass door. This is the same personality type who, as a cop, abuses those on traffic stops – like that cop in Indiana we saw here on the couch on video a few weeks/months ago threatening to murder an innocent civilian.

  18. Would someone please do a site search and find the video about the cop in Indiana ( i think) who loses his gear when he finds, late in the traffic stop that the driver has a weapon and a permit.

  19. #10 Bonecrusher, That was great!!! From the text;

    He was flabbergasted. He said FEMA never did it like this. Kenna replied, ”Well, this is the way we do it in Texas.”

  20. SD: You are correct. The reasonable thing would be for FEMA to look and learn how to do it the right way instead of the DC way. I’m not gonna hold my breath waiting for that to happen.

  21. #s 10, 37, & 38 – BC yanno I blew right past that one at first this mornin

    OUTSTANDING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (and we fellow Texans would expect nothing LESS!)

  22. re: my #36 above: Does anyone here remember the video where the cop pulls a car over and just goes ballistic, accusing the passengers of prostitution and the driver of being a “john” , then does a search of the car and is cussing and being extremely belligerent. It is in Indiana or Illinois or somewhere up in that region. The cop will not listen to any explanation and will not let the driver speak more than 2 words at a time. The driver tried 2 or 3 times to tell the cop he was armed but the cop would not let him speak. I would love to watch the video again and see what finally happened.

  23. I found the video here.
    This is a chronological update thread to this case. The driver has been charged but has not yet been able to go to trial. The cop has not had his hearing yet; he could be fired at that hearing.
    A month after this incident took place this same cop is caught on his own dash camera doing the same wissin thing and again a 3rd time in Sept of this year!
    If the police chief of Canton, Ohio, can’t look at the 3, count them THREE dashboard camera videos of this cop threatening to murder a civilian during a traffic stop and not immediately fire him, the Chief needs to go as well. The cop, Daniel Harless is a menace to society and needs to spend some time in jail.

  24. I don’t know what triggered the memory of that bad cop, but I am glad that I ran the string on it. Google is my friend. I find it appalling that the cop has remained on duty with these videos having gone viral. That cop is the definition of a jack booted thug and has no business in law enforcement and should be permanently barred from ever possessing a firearm. What a miserable excuse for a human being!

  25. #28 – Since no one stepped up to the plate to judge yesterday’s caption contest, I unilaterally decided to volunteer to judge the event. After careful consideration and review of all the captions submitted, I finally concluded that there was a tie. The two comments that were presented in post number 1 yesterday were without a doubt the two best ones submitted. No need to thank me for this service – I’m always glad to be of service.

  26. #47 EG
    Didn’t you see my #31? I reported on the clear winner and then judged a pretty good second place ribbon. Or maybe you skip my posts because after all I am one a them inferior female beings?

    BTW, I laughed at your “Who dat axing me” caption but ruled it ineligible as it is racist. 🙂

  27. #48 – As one might expect, you label something as racist simply because you do not appreciate the underlying nuance and meaning that the phrase is intended to project. It’s a take off on NOLA sheik saying “Who dat gonna beat dem Saints” coupled with Harry Reid’s comments concerning his ability to not use Negro dialect unless he wants to. In addition, it adds credence to “sound ignorant” when caught with his hand in the cookie jar trying to deny any involvement with solar panel scam, even though he has investments in the company. No, the comment is not racist – it is a meticulously thought out, brief but witty observation presented to convey the emergence of many concepts at once. Clearly, it’s the best of the litter.

    (If you believe this, I’ll go back to making more homespun observations concerning women)

  28. #51 Speaking of homespun, I think maybe you made up all those trains of thought that led you to your “who dat axing” caption… posthumously. After the fact. To explain it all away.

    But either way, I did think it was a funny caption.

    And when I say “racist” followed by a :), that is like Pyro’s “hater.”

  29. Acerbic, cranky and frequently funny guy, Joe Queenan, writes in the WSJ about why he quit going to social functions.

    The upwardly moral children of the bourgeoisie are obsequiously, uncompromisingly virtuous. They ride bikes everywhere. They never eat meat. They refuse to watch television. They eat with wooden chopsticks. They only read books by authors named Jonathan who live in Brooklyn. They themselves are named Jonathan and live in Brooklyn. That is because everyone who is good and just and whip-smart and special in this society lives in Brooklyn. If you had good children like mine, you would know that. Your children probably live somewhere horrid, like Toledo, Ohio. And they’re probably named Susie or Fred.

    As a mean-spirited, amoral crank who has labored mightily to raise reasonably insensitive kids, I find precociously virtuous children revolting. Luckily, I don’t have any. I don’t want my kids bailing out the faceless Trans-Caucasus masses or helping Jimmy Carter hammer nails in Detroit. I want them to be rich, so they can buy me a chalet in the Alps or at least cover my geriatric wisdom-teeth extractions. I grew up poor; I’m looking for payback.

  30. #55 – ROFL – I saw that one on a bike board yesterday…………I betcha Mister Favor & Rowdy Yates would have LOVED to have one o those little R/C trucks!!

  31. Welcome back Texpat with some cool posts. Been missing you since the hurricane flooded your basement. BTW, you never gave us an account of your weather adventure.

  32. Since the onslaught of the worst drought in history, there have been a lot of jokes told about how any old fool could pen cattle right now.

    Woody Allen could pen cattle these days.

  33. RE: my #61 – from the comments on HotAir………

    How soon they forget the lesson George W. Bush taught the EPA back when he was Governor. The EPA raised emission standards on car inspections SO HIGH that a brand new car, rolled right off the tractor trailer wouldn’t pass. Bush told the EPA to back off, and they said if he didn’t give in, they’d withold Federal money to the state. Bush told em’ to pound sand and witheld the money the state send the Feds instead. EPA blinked, and changed the standards back.

    There’s your model.

  34. Wicked always be comin’, so don’t look back, something might be gaining on you.

    – William Satchel Shakespeare

  35. Drudge has a link to this story about Michelle Obammy wearing diamond bracelets to a DNC fundraiser. I’m glad I looked at it because it features an odd photo of the alien overlords in an awkward embrace. It’s meant to show the wrist bling, but it also reveals the superficial hug and kiss. I am now starting to credit a Hamster who opined that the O’s are not getting along so splendidly. A link comment:

    That’s a “kiss”??? Looks like they can’t stand to touch each other…

  36. #10

    Good to see that story get out, it made the rounds on FB in our little world, but it should go viral ! I saw a few commentors here and there agreeing HEB was there purely for the marketing aspect. A friend of mine talked to one of the HEB people there who said they were under strict orders – no interviews with the media! They were being good neighbors, hey it’s all that to give back, right?

  37. I haven’t shopped at HEB in decades, but the company has a long history of “pitching in”, for lack of a better term. My husband lived through a hurricane in the 1970s that destroyed much of Corpus Christi. He was a radio DJ whose station stayed on-air on emergency generators throughout the storm, the martial law and the recovery period. He still talks about how HEB immediately opened their stores and warehouses for relief supplies. Might as well, it was clear it would be weeks if not months before life could return to normal down there. That is the kind of information about a company that sticks with you long-term.

  38. #58

    O, that way madness lies; let me shun that;
    No more of that.

    Uh, Pyro? It may be too late in your case.

  39. #74 mharper42

    Just wanted to let you know about the jewelry lent to and worn by Michelle Obama at the fundraiser in Manhattan.

    It was designed by a young Texas girl named Katie Decker from Houston who has a showroom on Woodway as well as a booth in a fashion mall in the oh-so-swanky SoHo district of Manhattan.

    We can all rejoice in the fact that Michelle has just boosted the career of a young Aggie girl who started designing jewelry in her dorm room in College Station.

  40. #78 Texpat
    Yes, the Houston connection was mentioned in that UK dailymail article. What was not mentioned in the article, much to the disgust of many commenters, was whether the $42K worth of bracelets were on loan or “boughten”. Although as some said, either way, loaned or purchased, opulent jewelry on FLOTUS out in public is very poor taste when the economy is in shambles.

  41. #80 Mh42

    Yes, I agree on the inappropriate behavior of the First Lady, but, I think we are all pretty used to that now.

    I just wanted to illustrate the sweet irony of a clueless and clumsy woman in power inadvertently helping a little, redstate girl hit the big time.

    There is justice on this earth, and, despite what some may believe, a Creator of this universe with a robust sense of humor.

  42. There is justice on this earth, and, despite what some may believe, a Creator of this universe with a robust sense of humor.


  43. #76 – I would never question HEBs generosity………………..but for Gawdsakes their stores were laid out by Stevie Wonder!! 🙂 (‘s’ why I won’t shop there)

  44. 85 Katfish says:
    September 23, 2011 at 12:47 am
    #76 – I would never question HEBs generosity………………..but for Gawdsakes their stores were laid out by Stevie Wonder!! 🙂 (‘s’ why I won’t shop there)

    I shopped HEB quite happily when I lived in Corpus a long time ago. Never lived close to any HEB in Houston until current home. It was a ghetto HEB and I only went there one time, soon after we bought this house 15 yrs ago. The whole store smelled like sour milk. It had a stench that seemed to be soaked into the floor, walls, ceilings and fixtures. Gar!

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