Thursday Hubba Hubba Open Comments

Here I am, holed up in this very, very posh, yet quaint, hotel somewhere north of the Mediterranean, south of Denmark, east of the Atlantic, and west of the Pacific (to narrow it down to essentially a hemi-hemisphere 😉 ). I finally get a usable (free) WiFi signal and what do my eyes behold?

Why it’s an article about a couple of my very favorite things: wimmins and bathing suits (wimmins’ bathing suits – get your minds out of the gutter you pervs).

For once, in a (relatively) major mass-market oriented article, I am part of a substantial majority. Namely that this look:

is preferable to this look:

What do you people think?

ps: I do not want to hear any snarky comments about “Benzion’s rule” or “where the #*@& do you find these pictures” this time. You people can be such a bunch of whiny-butts.

Remember

Memorial Day is upon us. While we all will likely participate in some leisure activities, take a moment or two to remember those who gave their last full measure so that we might be able to enjoy our liberty.

Here are a couple cartoons from mharper42:

Friday “The Chord” Open Comments

Much debate has occurred over the years about The Chord.

Most immediately and intuitively know exactly which chord is being discussed. Until recently, the exact composition of that musical phrase has been much of a mystery.

The true musician of The Beatles has stated that, while his playing might have been the predominant note,
there was more involved than just that.

Q: Mr Harrison, what is the opening chord you used for “A Hard Day’s Night”?
A: It is F with a G on top (on the 12-string), but you’ll have to ask Paul about the bass note to get the proper story.

Leave it to a **ahem** mathematician (of which your humble correspondent is one) to use advanced mathematical techniques, modeling, and other analysis beyond the reach of lesser persons to determine its composition.

Turns out, there were five musicians involved in that single chord:

So, all in all, what do we have?

George Harrison: Fadd9 in 1st position on 12-string electric guitar
John Lennon: Fadd9 in 1st position on a 6-string acoustic guitar
Paul McCartney: high D played on the D-string, 12th fret on electric bass
George Martin: D2-G2-D3 played on a Steinway Grand Piano
Ringo Starr: Subtle snare drum and ride cymbal

Where does that leave our intrepid mathematician?

The resulting chord was completely different than anything found in songbooks and scores for the song, which is one reason why Dr. Brown’s findings garnered international attention. He laughs that he may be the only mathematician ever to be published in Guitar Player magazine.

Gotta love it.

Thursday Joke Open Comments

Okay, the first time I heard this story, I immediately thought “This sounds like a joke!”

A man, a zebra, and parrot walk into a bar….

But it’s real. Of course, the zebra/parrot chauffeur had obviously been imbibing already, having a blood alcohol content of .14, when the legal limit was .08. That may be why he thought the bar would accept his animals.

The man was not part of a bachelor party or trying to re-enact the Hangover, rather, this man and his wife apparently see the animals as their children, and often take them for drives.

Did his wife know he was taking the animals down the path to delinquency? Or did she think they were merely going on a nice evening drive to look at the stars?

Can you imagine the scene at the police station?

“Sarge, we’re bringing in a OWI.”
“Roger that. What’s your ETA?”
“Well, that may depend on the vet.”
“Vet? What vet? Iraq war vet?”
“Nope, a vet vet. Animal vet.”
“Is he the OWI?”
“Nope, Sarge, he’s rescuing the animals.”
“Are you joking, or did it get that wild out there tonight?”
“I called him to look at a zebra this evening.”
“Where the hell did a zebra come from?”
“Originally from Africa, I’m pretty sure.”
“No, dammit! Tonight! Where’d the zebra come from tonight!”
“Oh – front seat.”
“Front seat of what?”
“The truck.”
“In the seat? You don’t mean the back? Or in a trailer?”
“No, sir, the front seat.”
“Holy crap, are you telling me a drunk zebra was driving a car tonight?”
“No, sarge, he was just riding along with the parrot.”
“So you have a drunk parrot?”
“I don’t know if the parrot’s drunk. He’s not talking, I can tell you that.”
“Where ARE you? At the zoo?”
“Sarge, we’re at the Dog House Lounge.”
“Son, are you telling me you have a dog, too?”
“No sir, just the zebra and the parrot.”
“In a dog house.”
“No, sir, not IN a dog house. AT the Dog House. It’s a bar.”
/long pause, mumbles something like “this better not be a joke…”
“Okay, this is giving me a headache. Let me recap, you have a zebra -not drunk- , a parrot -also not drunk-, but no dog, at the Dog House Lounge?”
“Yessir, Sarge, that’s right.”
“Any other critters involved?”
“Not that I know of, sir.”
“How the hell did a zebra and parrot get to the bar?”
“Jerald Reiter brought them.”
“In his truck.”
“Yes, sir, in his truck.”
“How do you get a zebra into the front seat of a truck?”
“It just kinda – gets in and sits down, sir. Wedges in pretty tight, but he does it.”
“Were they buckled up?”
“Sarge, I don’t know. Mr. Jeiter was trying to get them back into his car when we arrived.”
/pause
“Let me get this straight. Mr. Jeiter drove a zebra and a parrot to a bar to get a drink.”
“Yes, sir.”
“And this isn’t a joke.”
“No, sir, it’s not. I’m looking right at them right now.”
“Does he do this often?”
“I’m not sure, sir. He said he and his girlfriend take them for drives for fun.”
“What’s his girlfriend’s name?”
“Vicky Teters.”
“Okay, now I know you’re joking! Reiter and Teters?! Did Jones put you up to this?”
“No, sir, these are real people, sir.”
“Real people with pets like zebras and parrots.”
“That’s what I understand, sir.”
“So, Reiter and Teters take their zebra and parrot for drives in their truck.”
“That’s what he says, sir.”
“So if you arrest Teters…”
“Reiters, sir.”
“…REITERS, then, will (pause) Miss Teters get the animals, then?”
“We’re waiting to see what condition Miss Teters is in, sir. If Mr. Reiters is drunk and shows up with a zebra and parrot, I want to know what condition Miss Teters is in, and what she comes with, before I release these two into her care.”
“And that’s where the vet comes in.”
“Yes, sir. I mean, if these were kids, we’d place them in some kind of foster care for the night, wouldn’t we? We can’t just let them wander around, and the barkeep doesn’t serve animals.”
“Son, I have no idea what the rules are for this one, but I think I need a drink myself!”

Wednesday Why Invent A Religion Open Comments

Spengler shares some interesting thoughts about Mohammedanism.

The nut:

Serious scholars no longer argue that Judaism is somehow descended from an Egyptian sun cult. No-one has yet explained, moreover, why an ancient tribe would invent a history that portrayed its ancestors as slaves, or itself as conquerors of a land rather than as its autochthonous and legitimate inhabitants. In short, there is neither a literary, nor an historical, nor an anthropological, nor an archaeological argument against the Jewish claim that the written and oral laws were given to Moses at Mt. Sinai.

Christianity proposes to extend the Jewish covenant to all of humankind. After countless academic lives have burned out in the “search for the historical Jesus,” no reputable scholar claims to be able to demonstrate that Jesus of Nazareth was a fiction. One can argue about the reliability of different accounts of Jesus, but not the existence of Jesus himself. The Christian doctrine of Jesus’ resurrection cannot be refuted. One believes it, or not.

But Islam is an entirely different matter.

Read the rest.

Monday Prison Riot Open Comments

There’s a big prison riot going on over in Natchez this morning. One Correctional Officer has been killed and several others have been injured. There are some pretty impressive pictures out there. Here’s a link. I can’t figure out how to select text in a combox on this retarded Windows phone.

http://www.natchezdemocrat.com/2012/05/21/prison-riot-leaves-one-dead-others-injured/

At least it’s better than a Blackberry.